Back To School Days

The days just passed so quickly in school. Even the hours flew by like lightning unlike my time at Fuji Xerox. I've started to teach even at the second day of work. I realized that standing in front to talk to 30 kids is really different from standing in front to do a presentation to 3 adults. I felt at ease talking to them and things were much easier. They just absorb whatever you are talking about, of cos must be correctly teachings la =P

Anyway, food in canteen may be super duper cheap but it's also super duper unpalatable. Yucky yucks really. For the past 2 weeks, I've only eaten the food there once. Despite walking up and down the canteen umpteen times, I just cannot bring myself to eat the food especially I'm such a picky eater. First, they sell cornflakes with milk for $0.50. Oh please, the cornflakes are all so mashy in the milk. Then I saw macaroni soup! It's really a plain soup with 2 mini fishballs and some uncooked lettuce (yes, lettuce!) in it that cost $0.70. The Chinese rice store sells sunny side up with soy sauce and rice. All these are really kids meal. So all these while, I've been enduring till I'm home to have a meal. I think I will say hi to gastric and bye to same fats soon lolx. To think that I thought I could save SOME money from food once I start school? I think I can save ALL money on food. My mum even tabao down for me! Crap.

Besides not eating, I've been running about, the most active job in my whole working career. Lolx. I have to go up and down the staircase a few times a day, bringing my students to different places in the school. Not to mention about the non-aircon rooms, I've been sweating out. I hope to lost that 3kg soon! haa..

So on the second day, I was asked to relief a class. Primary 3 students. As I was not equipped with all the necessary skills, I have problem managing the first class. Being a teacher, teaching is not difficult at all. It is the skill of managing 30 kids and making sure they pay attention. Kids these days are quite rude. Anyway, after the lesson learnt from the 1st class, the second class was so much easier to handle.

Now I'm officially taking over Primary 2 Maths and English and Primary 1 Arts! Yes, people like me who failed arts is taking arts! Anyway, I do not have to draw so it doesn't matter. They just have to take instructions from me. I've been attached to the most notorious primary 2 class. Usually each class has about 1 to 2 monkeys but in this class, I have about 6 monkeys to deal with and I really mean it. Each child is different and I actually made a boy cry on the same day. I realised that most of the children that have learning problems came from malfunctioned family. Their parents just simply do not care and expect teachers to discipline their kids when the most basic courtesy were not even taught to them to respect teachers. It's a vicious cycle. I realised that I am more easily accepted by the problematic kids and they opened up to me quickly.

I was talking to this girl whom the teachers were not able to make her talk for teh past 1 year. She only managed to mutter some words beginning of this year to 2 teachers. However when I took over the class, she started to react to me and now, she is talking to me =) I'm really glad because most of the other teachers were amazed by it. I realised that this girl has some psychological issues which is beyond our control. She has this fear for adults, for school, for strangers so she refuses to talk.

Next, this little boy with lots of disciplinary issues also talked to me and told me his parents are separated and the form teachers came to ask me how I did it. I did nothing really. I merely take the chance to talk to them gently about their family, about their recess etc and then they started to talk. Children are very sensitive people and being as innocent as they are, they genuinely know if you are true to them and tend to test you out to see what are your limits.

Seriously, I'm beginning to consider to go into counselling in school if this goes on. Haha... Convert to a counselor from a teacher, at least no books to mark, no lessons to plan! haa

Of cos, I have my bad times too. There are some whom I simply cannot control and despite the constant shoutings, sending them out of class, throwing worksheets, it just does not work. I have to simply ignore this group. Being a teacher, I began to understand the 101 theories on dealing with children, especially those problematic ones. I hear pitiful stories and there are only so much we can help. Many times, I was told to leave those who do not want to help themselves alone. Sooner or later, these kids will turn to be the last of the whole cohort but there's really nothing we can do about it. 1 teacher to 30 students, there are simply too many to care for. We have to go with the majority and those who are left behind, will have to fend themselves. This is the sad truth, this is life. I guess we do not get to see all these during the school days because we are oblivious to our surrounding friends who have poor results. Thinking back now, I wondered if they did survived eventually or are they the hooligans in today's society?

I still love what I'm going through for now. I hope that months after today, my interest in this job would still be as high as now. I'm so sick of finding what I want in my life, in my career. I'm so sick of searching endlessly for a job that I don't even know what my criteria are. I pray that this career crisis will end now otherwise, Ben is so gonna be disappointed in me.